Sunday 12 July 2009

Hold....Move


I've had a number of times in the last couple of months where I've wrestled a little bit with God. The older I get the more inclined I am to ask His opinion, rather than figure everything out on my own...a good thing. Until you don't like the answer! However, I've also learned that being where God wants you, in life, is the best place to be even when the going is tough. I've found that when the going does get tough it is the greatest comfort knowing that God is with me every step of the way and that the tough stuff must have a greater purpose.

So it is, that the tough stuff in one particular instance must have greater purpose for me. God his holding me in a ministry that I'm struggling with a little bit. Interestingly I keep getting an absolute, no questions asked NO to my pleading for an out...even a temporary one! I was talking with a good friend the other day and I commented to her that it'd be nice to kind of 'know' what's behind it all. I don't want to know all the details....just a topic will do! Sticky nose, aren't I?! But I've often thought that an inkling or a time frame would make things a little easier to bear. I suppose then, that my focus would not be so much on trusting God completely, would it?

In complete juxtaposition I have another ministry opportunity where God has been prodding me to move. When God starts stirring in your soul and whispering to your heart and then presents you with the opportunity for that very thing, you just KNOW this is a 'meant to be' kind of thing.

As Dh and I have chatted over these things and I've shared my frustrations, thoughts, fears and a whole range of other emotions, his logical and initial responses have been the opposite in many cases, to God's direction ~ when I've finally sought it. I know Dh is looking at things and seeing how each situation effects me. He sees how busy I am and is concerned for my wellbeing.

I've been finding this quite an interesting discovery ~ that man's logic and rational thoughts, and very reasonable responses are not the ways of God. Man's rationality and logic seems to be in opposition to God...even when we are followers and lovers of Alighty God. I am being impressed upon with the knowledge that it is imperative that I must seek God's guidance rather than lean on my own understanding. For even as one who has an intimate relationship with her Creator, I am not naturally in step with His ways.

5 comments:

Pom Pom said...

Good stuff. Sometimes I get so muddled in my thinking and I journal and journal and talk and talk when I could be praying and waiting on HIM. I am SO glad He moves in spite of us! How's teaching going?

Tracy said...

We're on mid year/term 2 break right now...so very quiet :) Next week I'll be back for work break and have some tasks to be done for teachers. Then we'll be back into it again.

Anonymous said...

Oh yes, so familiar this.

I'm SLOWLY beginning to just give the reigns to God and sit back for the ride! Not easy, as I like to know exactly what's ahead so that I can plan, plan, plan!

Funny how sometimes we seem to end up in ministries we wouldn't have actually chosen for ourselves.

Great post. xx

Sandra said...

I've struggled with this my whole life, I'm not good at giving it over to the Lord and then letting Him take care of it, it's the whole control thing with me.

Tracy said...

I'm a bit of a control freak too Sandra. Like Tina said, I'm a planner and I like to be prepared and have things sorted.
Unfortunately that doesn't leave a lot of room for TRUST. And God is so much more interested in that!

It's taken me some very trying times to learn that God is absolutely and completely trustworthy, even when I don't get it.