Thursday, 10 September 2009

Off the Radar

I've learned a thing or two over the last two week's. Perhaps I'm just a really really slow learner, but I finally got it! Lying in bed, awake, for 2-4 hours every night trying to mentally arrange my day and figure the best way to try and make the seemingly impossible work is a waste of time....and a complete waste of the dark hours set aside for sleeping!

The last two Sunday night's I've awakened in the early hours ~ around 3am and lain awake getting my brain all tied up in knots trying to figure out how tricky logistical things should happen so that everyone gets what they're meant to...of my time, for my ability to take a to get a wheelchair onto trains and boats. You name it, I've laid there wide awake working it through. Each time, only to find that the issue becomes a non existence because God just orchestrates things so my worrying has been for absolutely nothing.

I have decided that I will not keep doing this to myself. When I start to worry about some situation that is completely out of my control, I will choose to leave it with God and simply ask that He handles it for me. Even if it is in my control I'm letting it go. I'm too tired and too busy to continue staying awake for vast amounts of time throughout the night.

Someone remind me of this post when I start babbling incoherently about Christmas and extended family and expectations....and all the 'stuff' that seems to go with that, will you. Like I said. I'm a really slow learner.


belinda said...

Congratulations in seeing the pattern and working to change your response.

Honestly, I think this one area where most of us consider ourselves slow learners. Giving control of a situation over to a higher purpose and just trusting that what happens is what is supposed to .. really tough for most of us.

Kind Regards

Left-Handed Housewife said...

I do this too sometimes--go through long periods of it--and I'm a slow learner, too. I actually keep a prayer box under my bed, and when I finally remember to, I write down whatever problem I can't untangle on a small square of paper and pop it in. It's good to ritually let go of stuff.


Tracy said...

Ahhhhh yes....trusting God's sovereignty rates up there with really tough for most of us.

I like that idea Frances. A lot. I bet if you went through in a year's time you wouldn't remember much about those things that seemed so huge at the time.